The God Who Sees Me

by Gary Mueller

“If you love me and truly know who I am, I will rescue you and keep you safe. When you are in trouble, call out to me. I will answer and be there to protect and honor you.” –Psalm 91

“‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for good and not for evil to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.'” –Jeremiah 29:11-13

It all began a few weeks ago. I got up early as I usually do and sat down at my prayer table to do my devotions and morning prayers. But something was different. Things were not the same. I felt an overwhelming sense of sadness and had a big knot in my stomach. I wanted to cry.

You see, several months earlier, I had started down a road of illness and disability. I sustained a cracked toe because someone stepped on it, later resulting in a case of cellulitis. Then I discovered that my left leg was a mess because I had a case of osteoarthritis that was eating my left hip away, which was in turn causing knee and back problems. I felt an overwhelming sense of “what is happening to me?” along with a debilitating depression of “there is nothing I can do about it.” As I pondered all of this that morning, I just sat there and began to cry. There were all kinds of things that I knew God had called me to do, but this physical wreckage was interfering with me doing them. My joy was fading away and I felt a profound feeling of sadness.

With not knowing what else to do I began to pray, and I prayed harder than I ever had to my God who told me through Psalm 91: “If you love me and truly know who I am, I will rescue you and keep you safe. When you are in trouble, call out to me. I will answer and be there to protect and honor you.” This Psalm is displayed on the computer screen that I look at every morning. Did it help me right then? No, it did not, but I went ahead and started down the seemingly endless and frustrating road of doctor visits. I also began to pray hard every day for God to open my eyes to where He was taking me; to help me to regain the happiness I had lost and to restore my will to continue with my ministries. This went on for weeks as I begged for pain medications from my doctor for relief that he would not give me. Apparently, it was better for me to suffer than to feel better.

Then one day I went out to do a parking valet mystery shop at Rady Children’s Hospital. After getting started, I entered the hospital waiting room and sat down in a chair near the front door to wait for the time when I could leave. After about 30 minutes, a nurse walked over and handed me a small sticky note. On it was written: Jeremiah 29:11-13. I knew what it was, and the nurse looked at me and said, “I was told that I needed to come over here and give you this.” (The verse says: “‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for good and not for evil to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.’”) I broke down and cried. I couldn’t help myself as I thanked her because I knew this message was from the Lord through her. The nurse and I spoke and prayed together for a while after that for each other before saying goodbye. My sadness immediately left me and I regained a sense of purpose and hope because my God who loves me also showed me that He sees me in my distress and has not forgotten me.

So that is why I lovingly share my experience with you. I don’t know what you may be going through right now, but I can confidently tell you that our creator is “the God who sees us” and that He is with you right now, even as you read this.

May God bless you!

Our Prayer:  On this day of Your blessing, we pray against every spirit of sickness, mental illness, infirmity, pain, and discomfort. We declare that through the sacrifice of Jesus, we will be healed and walk in divine health and wholeness. Lord, heal our bodies, restore our strength, and renew our minds. Give us a healthy, balanced, and disciplined life to honor You and Your church with our bodies, will, and emotions. We pray this in Your glorious and gracious name, Amen.